The Test

Jordan had been searching the electronics store for what seemed like an hour. He was looking for the perfect calculator for his upcomming math test. His father was waiting outside and he knew that he was getting impatient. He didn’t blame him, he should have found what he was looking for a long time ago, but he wanted to find the exact calculator that could do the complicated questions he knew were on this test. Finally giving up, he asked the stores manager.

“Hi, I have a big math test tomorrow and I need a calculator that can do all sorts of special things”.

“Special things eh? I think I have just the calculator for you, but it’s a new brand that still being tested, if that’s okay?”. Looking over it, Jordan saw all of the things it was capable of doing, deciding he wanted it, he asked the manager how much it cost.

“Because it’s new and still being tested, $20.”.

“Cool! Thanks Mister!”, Jordan said as he paid the manager. Meeting his dad outside the store, he apologized for taking so long and they went home so he could study.

The next day Jordan went to school with his new calculator in his pocket. As he was about to enter his classroom, he saw the manager of the store talking to his teacher. He wondered how the guy knew who he was, but was too afraid to ask. The morning bell rang and the class entered the room. As he sat down, Jordan took out his calculator and looked at all the complicated things it could do. He was in 3rd grade so he didn’t expect to ever need anything more advanced then division and multiplication, but wanted to get a calculator that could last him a long time. The teacher went through the normal morning activities, then handed out the test. She seemed to have a test specifically for Jordan, but didn’t say anything so Jordan assumed it was either his imagination or that the manager of the store simply wanted to see just what the calculator could do. He found the later to be a bit hard to believe so he stuck with the assumption that he was just imagining things.

The test was going well until he came to a very odd question.

“This problem is pretty complicated for a 3rd grade math quiz” he thought to himself. Fortunately for him, the calculator was super easy to use, and he managed to find the right buttons to type the equation in. As he hit enter, the calculator did something strange. It’s display changed to “Raccoon Metamorphoses activated, have a nice day”.

“What the hell is this?” Jordan asked, not noticing that his finer hails has lengthened and had become pointed and black. His hands and arms suddenly felt strange, and looking at his hands he saw why. The skin on the bottom of his hands looked strange and darker then normal. His fingers seemed longer then normal and his finger nails has grown even longer, looking almost like claws.

“Oh shit!” he said as he looked at it, trying to figure out what was going on. Looking at his arms, he saw that they were covered in fur, as he asked no one in particular

“Where did all this fur come from?” he had felt a twitching in his ears and no idea they had become pointed. His face started feeling strange and very itchy.

“What’s happening to my face?” he asked himself as he reached up to feel it. Fur began growing all over his face and his face started to pull itself out into a muzzle. His muzzle continued to push it’s way out and the fur on his face grew in black around his eyes. His ears started moving to top of his head and started growing fur. As his muzzle finished forming, his hair converted into fur and the fur on his face finished growing. His head looked little like a human head and look much more like a raccoon head. His teeth started to hurt, and opening his mouth and as best as he could, looked at them. Every one of his teeth had changed and had become sharp and fang like.

Fur grew down his neck and onto the rest of his body, it felt incredibly itchy as it was growing in. His stomach started to feel strange and he started getting fatter.

“Now I’m getting fatter?” he said, again to no one in particular. His shirt started to rip from his expanding stomach. Feeling a pulling feeling in his back, and he looked around and saw a tail pushing it’s way out, it was a classic raccoon tail, furry with several rings on it.

“A tail?” he said, feeling very scared and confused. His feet started to feel strange so he kicked his shoes off. His feet didn’t look human anyone, and look much more animal. They were furry and he had claws at the end of each toe. The changes did not stop there, he suddenly started to rapidly shrink, feeling pain and warmth at the same time as his body reshaped itself from a bipedal to a quadruped shape. His changes completed and he sat, or more so stood there on his chair, with his tattered clothes still on him. Looking himself over, all he could think was

“Holy crap! That equation changed me into a raccoon!”

Hearing someone calling him from behind, he threw his clothes off and stood on his hind legs, looking behind him towards the source of the sound. It was the guy sitting behind him asking him

“What did you get for number 1?”. Looking at him, Jordan felt confused, how was he going on explain this? Getting up onto his desk he looked back at the calculator. It’s display now read

“Raccoon metamorphoses complete, thank you for your co-operation”. Looking around, perplexed as to how no one could see what had happened to him, Jordan started to panic. Grabbing the calculator in his mouth, he was careful not to press any more buttons. He jumped off of his chair and ran out of the classroom and down the hall. He as approached the exit doors he saw the manager of the store. Trying to speak to him, to tell him what happened, Jordan realized that his vocal cords had changed as well. Chittering at the man he stood on his hind legs and showed him the calculator. Taking the calculator, the man put it in his pocket and picked Jordan up. Gently petting him, to comfort him seemed to work, as Jordan started feeling calmer. The man explained everything

“Congratulations Jordan, you passed the test. You’re probably wondering why this happened to you. Well, I run a wildlife preserve and I needed to find a way to populate it. Raccoons are one animal in particular that a lot of people don’t truly understand. I create the reserve so people could learn about a lot of different species of wildlife. I assure you, if you come with me, you’ll be very well treated, more then just well. You’ll live very well, and don’t fear your life expectancy will not be that of an animal. You live as long as a human. You will still remember everything, your body may be different, but you’ll still be you. There will be others, like you that you can play with. You’ll have a shelter that will have anything you want in it. TV, a computer, whatever you desire. You’ll be very well taken care of. And think of it this way, no more tests to worry about, no more worrying about what you’re going to wear tomorrow. So what do you say?”. Jordan looked at the man, what he had said was appealing to say the least, looking down at his body and looking back towards his classroom, he reached up towards the man and hugged him and smiled.

“Ill take that as a yes”, them man said happily.

Life on the reserve was great, Jordan had forgotten what it was like to enjoy the simpler pleasures in life. In time he had several companions, including a few female companions. The man watched the former human raccoons playing with each other, just enjoying being alive. Smiling as he walked to the entrance of the reserve to let in the next group visitors, he thought of how much he loved deals where everyone got exactly what they wanted.